And the process continues

IVF #2- I started writing this in January-

After the first week of medications (Birth Control and Metformin), my body started to get used to the metformin.  Thankfully I was able to ease myself back into a carb filled life and I was a much happier camper.  I am still taking the metformin, 3x's a day as much as the first week in fact, but it no longer causes the constant dramatic side effects. Although too much carbs or fried food and have me feeling pretty yucky pretty quick.

So here is what IVF #2 has amounted to so far:
1/2- Metformin and Birth Control
1/7- HSG *
1/11- Ultrasound - Start lupron shots**
1/18- last day of birth control
1/19- cycle
1/22- start estrogen pills and estrogen patch
2/1- Ultrasound and blood work
2/6- Ultrasound to check uterine lining and blood work
2/7- started progesterone oil shots (ouch)
2/9- learn to give the progesterone oil shots to myself (more on that later)
2/10- nausea (from hormones?)
2/10- fully hormonal....I am a mess!
2/12- FET...yikes....

2/13- slight cramping and abdominal twinges
2/16- nausea nausea nausea (don't remember this from IVF#1)
2/18- progesterone levels checked- all seems good
2/22- blood pregnancy test....yikes

*It's funny.  For some reason I was thinking the HSG was going to be simple blood work.  I have no clue why that was what I assumed it was, because it's not.  Nope.  Not at all.  So if you are heading into see your RE and they ordered you to have an HSG test it's actually a Hysterosalpingogram (easy for me to say, right?  Now I understand why they call it HSG).  It doesn't take very long.  What they do is place iodine dye in your cervix, then take x-rays of your uterus and fallopian tubes.  I had this done the first time...so you think I would have remembered...but apparently not.  It's totally normal to have this test done when starting the IVF process.  And chances are pretty good I will have to do this again if we have a successful pregnancy and want to "try" for more children. 

**Regular ultrasound to ensure I was ready for the Lupron shots.  I started 10 units of Lupron on this day.

Process #2 has certainly been much different than process #1.  I think a lot of it has to do with my state of mind.  I understand the process a little more this time around, although I will never brag as to knowing exactly what is going on. The process itself is insane and goes by so quickly it is hard to keep up with.  After a month or two you look back and think it's all a big blur....and it is.

This time around I did not have to go to see the RE all the time.  For #1 I felt like I was in their offices sometimes 2-3 times a week.  It makes sense.....the first time around they had to monitor my ovaries. They had to be absolutely sure my ovaries were producing healthy eggs.  They had to be certain there weren't too few and there weren't too many.  And most of all...the timing had to be absolutely perfect or my body would release the eggs on it's own and the entire process would be foiled.  So, it makes sense that I was there ALL THE TIME. 

For #2 my ovaries are practically ignored.  Since we have 4 frozen embryos, I do not need my ovaries to produce eggs.  In fact, we do not want them to function at all.  We are basically taking my ovaries completely out of the picture.  They are still making some eggs, but they are small and few and nothing to worry too much about at this point.  The best part about nixing my ovaries from process #2....no chance of suffering from OHSS this time around!  SWEET!!!

Sadly on the afternoon of 2/22 I received a call from my nurse letting me know our first FET had not resulted in a pregnancy. Both Brandon and I were pretty sad to receive this news (obviously). I think it was hardest because I was so certain I WAS pregnant. With IVF#1 I basically had zero pregnancy symptoms and was certain it had not happened. This time, I thought I knew the little feelings and twinges I was experiencing and I was sure it was leading us to a positive pregnancy test. My doctor warned me early on not to invest too much in any early symptoms, as these were often created by the multiple medications I was taking.

Although my heart hurt once my nurse told me our sad news, knowing that I had a sweet, healthy, amazing 15 month old at home, made the news much easier to take. Brandon and I are always aware that Josie is our miracle child. She happened when the odds were against. She happened while my body was doing all it could to reject IVF #1. She happened despite the fact that my husband's body planned to never give him a chance. She is our blessing.....and we know this every day. I have never dreamed of having only one child, but we know nothing about our journey has been the way we imagined.

Luckily we still have two frozen embryos. We hope to have the opportunity to try again. We hope this will lead to a healthy pregnancy. We hope Josie will end up with an additional sibling (or two). And if she doesn't...we will continue to be thankful for our beautiful blessing.